Supermarket Sweep

Super Market Sweep
Saturday was the day Julie came to the upstate house, which will be mine once I buy out her share, to verify that she did not leave anything of hers behind and that I was not engaged in any malfeisance (like hiding important belongings from her). Happily, the boys were there, as was one of her nicer friends, so it was difficult for this to spin out of control. Still, the general tone was less Hans Blix than Supermarket Sweep 60 seconds only to fill her shopping cart with all the goodies she can wheel out of the store (well, not actually take today, is it OK if I leave them here a while longer?). It’s very easy to say, “Oh, that’s mine, that’s mine, too, I wanna, I want that, I wanna” when you didn’t pay for it the first time and have no intention of paying for it now. But since Julie generally has such horrid taste, the few things she wanted, with one or two exceptions which I think best to just let go for the sake of my sanity, will not be missed. She obsessed particularly on a book on the history of the Hudson River, brought it up three times Saturday, and in a follow-up email cc’d to her attorney today; I looked on abe.com and a new copy can be had for $1.97. I’m sure cc’ing her lawyer will cost at least 10 and probably 100 times that amount. But it’s not as much fun buying an old book on abe as insinuating that your effing ex carefully buried her most prized possessions in the crawl space under the house.
Take a good look around, baby, if everything goes well, it’s the last time you’ll ever visit this house.